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Gilena: Whew [link widoczny dla zalogowanych], it feels like a weight lifted off my shoulders, or like giving birth. Emotionally I’m on a postpartum high. There’s some difficult issues with my mother that I was hesitant about writing. But after putting it all down in a cohesive manuscript and really looking at what happened to me as a child, together with what happened to me as a widow, I feel a tremendous sense of closure and peace. I feel great.
Suite101: What place are you now emotionally in your life after this book?
Suite101: Tell me what compelled you to write your book called A Life Imagined, which is about such a personal topic.
Gilena: Well luckily for me I kept detailed journals of my journey, if not, it would have been nearly impossible to go back and recall the exact depths of my pain, the details that happened in the early months and years of my widowhood. The most difficult part was finding closure and an ending, because once I explained my own dysfunctional family issues, the obstacle was then, how do I finish it? It was a few years ago when I was having writer’s block regarding the ending and my friend said that it’s because I’m stilling living that part of my life in the book.
Gilena: The interesting thing is that a lot of readers like myself lose steam during the writing process. What kept me going and propelling me towards the ending was putting excerpts of my book on a blog and getting feedback from readers. Every time I got comments from readers, it would put wind in my sails and pushed me forward. Many widowed women have read it and call it an inspiring book. They say 'thank you for writing this because there’s nothing out there like this and now I don’t feel so alone'. Even the dysfunctional family issues within the book have helped people who weren't widowers.
Read on
Depression is One of the Five Stages of Grief to be Processed
Denial can be the First of Five Stages of Grief
Grieving the Loss of a Loved One
Visit Gilena's website to learn more about her book A Life Imagined (paperback, 342pp., ISBN# 978-0-615-20961-6).
Suite101: What was the most difficult obstacle to overcome during the writing process?
Gilena: When I was widowed 10 years ago, my first instinct was to go to a bookstore to find a book, but there were no books on young widowhood. The few books that were available dealt with widowhood in the later years and how to get your finances together [link widoczny dla zalogowanych], but there were no experiential books. My story is both unique and universal in a sense that even people who are not widowed can relate to it. I knew there was a compelling story there so that’s what compelled me to write it.
Suite101: How has sharing your experience helped people?
Suite101 sat down with first time author Gilena Simons to discuss her new book [link widoczny dla zalogowanych], A Life Imagined. It's a personal memoir of how she faced the sudden death of her husband, experienced years of grief afterwards, and how writing the book help her process of healing.